One Month Later

Lately it seems like everything has been messed up.  Maybe I'm stuck on the negative, but I really don't feel like I've been surrounded by this much negativity and had this many unfortunate events stacked against me before in my life.  Maybe I'm just more mature so I can handle it?  I'm not really sure.


These days I feel like crying out in mourning and in praise.  It's such a strange feeling.

My ideas can't be confined and organized now.  I can't even begin to grasp the situation let alone break it apart and build it back in a way that I can understand.  I'll stay scatterbrained and confused until I find the start point of this and understand how this is supposed to go.  For the time being, I'll stay dumbfounded.

The Lord is near the brokenhearted, and He's been reaching out to me in ways so beautiful.  From hearing songs and laughing uncontrollably to finding the beauty in nature, to seeing the stars and feeling distant yet connected.  I'm seeing what parts of life are worth hanging on to and which parts are worth letting go.


And in the one time I have people asking me for advice, I need advice and support.  I hate being in this role, because I don't really play it much.  But more than anything right now, I want fellowship with true friends when I hang with God, too.


Anyway

Reach out to me.  My arms are short and I'm already in the dark.